Carnival of Wealth, Fall into Fall Edition

UPDATE: Submission form link for next week’s carnival fixed. Sorry about that.

There’s nothing more depressing than people who talk about “the end of summer” when it’s not even mid-August. Do you suck the joy out of everything else too, or just the best season of the year? We’ve still got a few days remaining before that infernal equinox. Enjoy it while you can.

That being said, this is our final CoW of the summer. Not the final CoW of the summer, just ours. Next Monday we’ll be hosting the itinerant Totally Money Blog Carnival, which means the Carnival of Wealth will stop by Financial Uproar for the briefest of respites. You’ll be in for a treat. Nelson, the guy behind Financial Uproar, has almost as little patience for stupidity as we do. Plus he’s funny, and can spell and punctuate.

Original, non-stolen artwork ©Financial Uproar 2011, all rights reserved

Next week’s CoW will work the same way it always does: just submit by midnight Saturday. And to get in on the Totally Money Carnival, submit here. Now, on with the show:

Speaking of counting summer’s chickens before they’ve hatched, Jon the Saver at Free Money Wisdom points out that “One of the best times of the year for many families is the summer.” He’s right: most families rank summer in their top 4 seasons. He suggests 12 things to do in the 9 remaining days of summer, which means you’d need to do 1.3 of his recommended activities every day from here on in to cross them all off the list. He claims that a day of crafts (“Most kids love crafts”) is something your family will remember for many years to come. And he’s right. That day my brother and I made papiermâché death masks in 1975 is something we still talk about.

Tim Fraticelli at Faith & Finance lists 12 things you don’t want to skimp on. We would have added jackstands, bullets, pet medicine and water filters. (Aside: “skimp” and “scrimp” are pretty close to synonymous. Why would anyone add an extra letter if they didn’t have to? Seems like a waste.)

Apparently Janet at Credit Cards Canada read that old piece of homespun wisdom about not grocery shopping on an empty stomach, and decided to share it with us. To save money on groceries, she also suggests that you USE A LIST. Also, BUY IN BULK if you can. She also helpfully suggests that you bring trail mix along when you run errands. The number of people who didn’t bring trail mix with them on errands but now will because Janet recommended doing so? We’re guessing zero.

At the rate we’re going, by 2022 the entire internet will consist of nothing but porn and personal finance posts about how to be frugal. Unfortunately we can’t showcase the former here, but Miranda at Financial Highway is helping us choke to death on the latter. Her 45 favorite parsimony strategies include: clip coupons, drink water from the tap, brown bag it…you get the idea. Of course you do, you have a functioning cerebellum.

Time for a good one. FMF at Free Money Finance test-drove a home safe, and interviewed an industry expert (alright, it was a representative of the safe company) about the pros and cons of introducing a cuboid metallic member into your family.

A: Of course not.
Q: Teacher Man at My University Money asks “Is a liberal arts degree worth it?”

How about post about frugality? We told you they were few and far between. Shawanda Greene at You Have More Than You Think gives her take on the topic, arguing for more balance. In fact, she says she lives by the motto “Big or small, I sweat it all.”

The couple behind Sustainable Personal Finance live in Canada, and like most Canadians, are a short drive from the United States. Tired of paying outrageously high prices compared to their American counterparts, SPF did the sensible thing: jettisoned their own commitment to buying local, and crossed the border to save money.

Again with the Canadians. Boomer at Boomer and Echo talks about the cheery topic of long-term health care insurance for the old and/or decrepit. (You mean Canadian health care isn’t free for everyone? No, it’s more complex than that. Who knew?)

Fanny at Living Richly on a Budget read and reviewed a book by some guy on TV. It’s called The Wealth Cure: Putting Money in its Place, and you’ll never guess what its message is. True happiness starts inside. If you are not truly happy inside, then you won’t be happy no matter how much more money you have. Another secret of the universe, uncovered right here in the Carnival of Wealth. Swish!

You’d never guess it from his picture, but Roger Wohlner of Chicago Financial Planner is a certified financial planner. It’s great to have a professional come in to the CoW once in a while and give a little complimentary analysis. Roger might not be a live wire, but information always trumps personality. Last February he posted what his Fidelity Freedom fund invests in, and this week he updates it.

Another post on frugality? Are you detecting a pattern? timw (pronounced “timw”) at Escape the Hum Drum says you should live modestly. timw’s own scrimping includes skimping on commas, which he used only 19 of in an 1100-word post. That’s not easy to do. We don’t know much about timw, but we’re flattered that despite being from the UK, he wrote his post for a North American audience by incorporating dollar signs into the narrative (yet tipped himself off by talking about living in a flat and saying “whilst.”)

The world would be a better place if more people wrote like Neal Frankle at Wealth Pilgrim. If you’re looking for some extra retirement income, you might be intrigued by the idea of a reverse mortgage annuity. It’s a way for you to tap into the equity of your home. You’ll receive that money for as long as you’re able to live in your home, and you won’t have to repay the loan. Since many people aren’t able to find (or are interested in finding) jobs in retirement, this could be a way to go.

Paula at Afford Anything doesn’t seem to understand that $ means “dollars” (“$1 million dollars”), but she does grasp the arbitrary nature of the base-10 numerical system and its psychological effects. Read her findings in “Who Wants To Be A $402,854-aire?” (number converted by us to base-12.)

Did Hurricane Irene do a number on your house? Maybe you suffered some mental anguish and can never go out in the rain again. Back Taxes Help shows how you can minimize the damage to your tax bill.

Finally, she missed the deadline but this post was so good we had to make an exception. Sandy of Yes I Am Cheap has a radical idea: maybe, just maybe, you shouldn’t have kids if you can’t afford them.

Thanks for stopping by. See you in a fortnight.

 

Carnival of Wealth, September 4 Edition

This is technically more county fair than carnival, but whatever

Is it Sunday already? First Sunday of the month? Then we hope you made the minimum payment on your credit card bill, and will have the balance paid off by 2027. Without further ado, here are the latest personal finance blog posts that made the cut. Again, these are actual posts from actual people (and maybe an SEO robot or two):

BREAKING NEWS: Starting next week, we’re moving the Carnival back a few hours. It’ll now post on Monday mornings here in North America. That should add a little excitement to the lives of our readers who work in offices, especially those in the Eastern Time Zone, as they sit at their desks madly refreshing the page and anticipating the Carnival’s arrival in their dull, predictable lives. No one ever does that on a Sunday night. Or you can also just go to ControlYourCash.com/feed to get notified instantly.

Again, these are the least average personal finance blog posts of the week, or at least the least average among the ones we received. If you want to get in on next week’s fun, submit here. Deadline is midnight, every Saturday.

(Aside: We’ve reached the point where we’re going to start every carnival off with a grammar lesson for the submitters who can’t write in functional English. Today, we’re going to learn the difference between plurals and possessives:

I bought the dogs some food.
I can’t find the dog’s leash.

See? The first one is a plural, and doesn’t take an apostrophe. The second one is a possessive, and does. You’re welcome.)

This week’s first entrant is a post-by-proxy. You know those CoinStar machines in the supermarket? The ones that let you pour your loose change into the slot and redeem it for paper currency? Of course you do, and you might even be dumb enough to use them. (If you let your loose change grow so big that it can’t fit in your car’s cupholder in the first place, you’re the 21st century equivalent of the Collyer brothers.) Nelson at Financial Uproar points out that using CoinStar machines is putting your money in an investment with a guaranteed return of -10.9%. Yet some people swear by it. If Nelson thinks an appeal to logic is going to convince retards to change their behavior, he’s got an exasperating life ahead of him.

Our research shows that nothing has started off with two Canadians since last year’s Juno Awards. Again, we love to break tradition at Control Your Cash. Sustainable Personal Finance explains the magic of compound interest, and the importance of paying yourself first: a stratagem that for whatever reason doesn’t come naturally to most people.

Few people write guest posts as well as Neal Frankle does, and this week the Wealth Pilgrim stops by Dough Roller to remind us yet again that retirement isn’t magic. You need to plan, forecast, save and invest now so you can drive around the continent in a Winnebago and complain about kids and their baggy pants later.

Did we mention we’re up for a Plutus Award this month? And that the guy who’s tallying the votes is intelligent, forthright, handsome and a god among men? That’s Flexo at Consumerism Commentary, who gives us 10 Tips to Avoid Overdraft Fees.

Speaking of awards, this week’s “Infomercial Masquerading As A Blog Post” is from Tim Chen at Nerd Wallet, who lists the Best No-Fee Credit Cards. (Redundancy saved by strikethrough. If a card charges a fee, then by definition you shouldn’t use it.)

Our three favorite Phil Taylors are that 334-pound rookie behemoth who debuts for the Browns this week, the guy who used to drum for Motörhead, and the creator of PT Money. This week he hands the reins to Ryan Sandberg, who lists 5 things you’re doing wrong if you want to build wealth. Here’s a creepy picture of Mr. Sandberg.

Can you handle another list of 5? Well, you’re getting one. Staff Writer (almost certainly not his real name) at Deliver Away Debt presents ways to pay off your student loans faster. He waits until #4 before going to the time-tested “just complain”.

You’re applying for a new job? Sorry to hear that. (Nothing personal, we just hate and hated working for other people.) But as long as you’re there, don’t leave money on the table. Free Money Finance explains how to negotiate.

Why should Australians move to another country to retire? Cheaper produce. Seriously. At least according to Kelly at Frugal Living. (By the way, Kelly: Bali? Not a country.)

Sweet Lord, another list of 5? Jonathan Milligan at CPA Career Coach presents that many “cool” ways to use Indeed.com. Because nothing’s “cooler” than posting your résumé, teens. Including cigarettes and sex.

Posts like this one from HSH are always fun. Richard Barrington lists the 12 best cities not to live in, but to live in the suburbs of. He even ratiocinates his findings to the 2nd decimal place. (To give him credit, he does practice what he preaches, living in a small town outside Rochester.)

It’s adorable that Tim Fraticelli at Faith and Finance thinks that people will heed his list of 33 ways to make money off the clock, but it’s there if you want it. Our favorite suggestion of his is to let people park on your property if you live next to a stadium, even though

To be honest, I’m not sure if you have to have a special permit, but it was worth bringing up as an idea!

Thanks for that, and thanks on behalf of the people who are good at graphic design yet never thought of charging people for it.

(FirstCreditCardResource.org, you sent 5 horrible posts this week, each worse than the previous one and each with a different byline. At this rate, sooner or later you’ll stumble across a contributor who can write. When you do, we’ll reconsider you. In the meantime, learn from someone literate. Such as…)

The efficient market is the stuff of hypotheses and textbooks. Mike Piper at The Oblivious Investor understands that that’s not how the real world works, but wonders whether it’s worth it to spend your time looking for inefficiencies.

Diversify your portfolio, create an emergency fund, don’t panic…Consumer Boomer has figured out all the things you should do to avoid stock market pain. A welcome relief, because we never would have thought of any of that.

We’ve got a new trusting soul entrant this week, the modestly styled Personal Finance Whiz. He got our attention by claiming that he’d figured out how you can pay a $221,800 mortgage off in only 5 years. So how do you do it?

By making $4,185.64 monthly payments! Wasn’t that easy?

Michael German at Everything Finance Blog gives half-hearted recommendations for credit cards “for job seekers”, who presumably want different rewards and credit limits than the rest of us. There’s also some meaningless references to interest rates in there, which any CYC reader knows are the least important features about credit cards.

Wait…there are wimmens who make more money than their men? Sure. Maybe those same females will even be voting and driving some day. Next thing you know they’re going to be attending school, too. Crystal at Budgeting in the Fun Stuff lives in this future world, and apparently her husband allowed her out of the kitchen long enough to write about it.

Thanks again for joining us. Y’all come back next week, right?

The Carnival of Wealth is filling up

Are you on board? You know how this works. On Wednesday we remind you of the upcoming Carnival, on Thursday you write 200 words on how saving is essential to money management, on Friday we read your submission and toss it, on Sunday the Carnival appears. While we go back through the archives and determine whether we usually capitalize “carnival” in this use, you can write something provocative and submit it here. Readers, join us Sunday. Or as we call it, chaff-and-wheat separation day.